What's Happening This Week 6-1-06

This was supposed to be posted on Monday, but being the punctual masked man that I am, here is the What’s Happening This Week.

NEW MUSIC

80’s Music Stripped – Various Artists
This CD is a collection of your favorite hits from the 80’s acoustic style. So if you were wanting to sing Jesse’s Girl around the camp fire, but don’t know how to play guitar, your dreams of swooning that D chested beauty just may come true.

Rescue Me Soundtrack – Various Artists
One of the best shows on TV is back for its third season and what better way to help promote the show then a collection of songs you never heard before. Rest assured the theme song by the Von Bondies is the first track.

NEW DVD’s

Date Movie Unrated
A sub par movie spoofing other sub par movies, enough said. It does however star the always adorable Alyson Hannigan of Buffy the Vampire and sticking a flute in her pussy fame. Don’t let the Unrated title fool you, its still a PG-13 flick.






Platoon 20th Anniversary Collectors Edition
The Oliver Stone classic is now out in a special Collectors Edition, just in case you didn’t get it the 4 other times it had been released.

TV SHOWS NOW ON DVD
The Venture Bros. Season 1
Numb3rs Season 1
Will and Grace Series Finale
Alf Season 3
The Dukes of Hazard The Complete 6th Season
The Kids in the Hall The Complete 4th Season



IN THEATHERS

The Break Up
This is the film that Vince Vaughn was lucky enough to be in when he caught Jennifer Aniston on the rebound. The movie foreshadows the inevitable future break up of the new power couple, when Jen finally realizes she is Jennifer Aniston and can do much better then Vince Vaughn.

The WWJ 2006 Summer Drinking Tour has some stops this weekend!!



The Big Empty will start their 2006 Reunion Tour this Friday night at Alamo Jacks. This band broke up earlier this year and then reformed with a new line up, but before they could play their 1st show as a new band, the original line up came back together. So if you’re on the Southside of Atlanta join WWJ for some drinks and catch this good 90’s and New Rock cover band before their VH-1 Behind The Music special is aired.

The WWJ 2006 Summer Drinking Tour will also be making a stop Saturday night at WWJ Sr. Photographer, Ray’s house party. He is trying to top the last party in which we learned that hot chicks actually like Star Wars and love a guy with a big Lightsaber, by making this one a Sexy Pajama Party. Plan on tons of alcohol, hot girls scantily clad and WWJ in the sexiest outfit Victoria’s Secret had in my size.



That’s What’s Happening This Week bitches. I will do my best to post up a new HBOTD, before I go out on Friday night. A recap of Ray’s party along with pictures and video will also make its way on here sometime next week.

As always send hate mail to jimmy@ThePunctualMaskedMan.net

Peace love and hair grease

What’s Happening This Week 5-24-06

Time once again to take a look at What’s Happening This Week.

NEW MUSIC

Dixie Chicks – Taking the Long Way Home
I always thought these chicks were lesbians, but it seems they are very anti Bush. This is supposedly the best CD they have ever put out (which isn’t saying much), but I am pretty sure they are still banned on all country stations and this could very well be the last we ever hear from them.


Death Leppard – Yeah
When I saw the cover of this CD I got extremely excited, but my excitement quickly turned when I found out that this CD doesn’t include a cover of the hit song from Usher, Ludacris, and Lil John. Just because they won’t be singing that on their tour this summer with Journey, doesn’t mean I don’t want to go. Anybody got tickets for the sold out show in Atlanta, HOOK A BROTHER UP!!!

Dont look for a special guest spot by Lil John


Angels and Airwaves - We Don’t Need To Whisper
Are you still crying over the break up of Blink 182? Well dry those tears you pussy punk rawker, because former Blink front man, Tom DeLonge has a new band that sounds just like his old band. This is sort of like that Super Group show on VH1, as Tom got David Kennedy the guitarist from Box Car Racer, bassist Ryan Sinn from the Distillers, and on the drums Atom Willard of Rocket from the Crypt and the Offspring fame. **WWJ Pick of the Week**

American Idol Season 5 Encores
American Idol is now over, but now you can take the glorified karaoke on the road with you as all your favorite season 5 contestants sing their favorite songs.

Her and the twins lost Idol to Michael McDonald


The Wreckers – Stand Still, Look Pretty
So you wanted to add some new chick sung country music to your collection, but don’t want your friends and family to think you’re a bad American because you bought the new Dixie Chicks CD? Well former pop star Michelle Branch and her gal pal Jessica Harp have put together the perfect CD for you.

They look hotter then the Dixie Chicks too


WWE Wreckless Intent
You can laugh all you want that the WWE is putting out a CD, but with bands like POD, Saliva and Oscar winning Three 6 Mafia, this CD might be worth a listen.

NEW ON DVD

Bloodrayne Unrated
Another good video game turned into a shitty movie. There is the plus of seeing Kristanna Loken in next to nothing and making out with Michelle Rodriguez. I may be wrong and I would advise you to check Mr.Skin, but I believe Kristen has a nude scene in it. IF she is naked then make this one a **WWJ Pick of the Week**

Transamerica
Felicity Huffman stars in this movie about a pre-operative male-to-female transexual awaiting gender-reassignment surgery. This movie will look great sitting right next to your Brokeback Mountain DVD.



Wrestlemania 22
Its the Super Bowl of wrasslin, where men become legnds. See how midget Rey Mysterio becomes the Heavyweight Champion, Bret Hart get inducted into the Hall of Fame and all the rest of this years Wrestlemania matches.


TV Shows now on DVD
Deadwood - The Complete Second Season
Boston Legal - Season 1
The Closer - The Complete First Season
Wings - The Complete First and Second Seasons
M*A*S*H - Season Ten (Collector's Edition)


IN THEATHERS

X-Men 3: The Last Stand
Even though it was directed by Brett Rattner, the final X-Men movie looks to be the best one of them all. If you go see this movie, and honestly you have no reason not to go see it, STAY TILL THE END!!! After the credits there is still more movie leaving it open for X4 or a possible spin off flick. **WWJ Pick of the Week**

Return of the blue body paint



ON TV

UFC 60 Hughes vs. Gracie
Saturday, the WWJ 2006 Summer Drinking Tour will be watching UFC 60 at a YTBD Hooters, because nothing goes better with the ass kicking that is UFC like mass quanties of wings, beer, and tight lil orange shorts. Need to know if a Sports bar near you is showing the fight? Click here to get a list of the US bars that are showing the fight. **WWJ Pick of the Week**



That’s What’s Happening This Week Bitches. Some more Video of the Day’s, another HBOTD(which is open for suggestions), a new segment and yes the return of everyone’s favorite The Unnamed Segment….really I am going to finally do it…promise.

As always send hate mail to jimmy@ShirleyHemphillIsSexy.org

Peace love and hair grease




Angels and Airwaves - We Don’t Need To Whisper
Bloodrayne Unrated Only if Kristanna is nude in it!
X-Men 3: The Last Stand
UFC 60 Hughes vs. Gracie

What's Happening This Week 5-15-06

I am back from my road trip to the mountains of North Carolina, so let’s see What’s Happening This Week.

NEW MUSIC

The Raconteurs – Broken Boy Soldiers
Jack White of the White Stripes has a side project that is just as good as the original. *WWJ Pick of the Week*
He is still going after Michael Jackson's title of Creepiest Person In Music


Ashley Parker Angel – Soundtrack To Your Life
You either remember him from his reality show on MTV or from his days in the boy band O-Town. If it is the latter, I would suggest you not tell anyone unless you’re a 14 year old girl. This had the makings to be a successful pop CD, but MTV dropped the ball and did not time the show with the release. He also didn’t have the Papa Joe machine behind him like the Ashlee Simpson had behind her show and CD.



Hoobastank – Everyman For Himself
The Stank is back with their third release. I got a chance to listen to it last week and its good, but nowhere near as good as their last 2 efforts.

Cam’ Ron – Killa Season
WHAT!?!?! WHAT!?! Perfect soundtrack for drive bys.

Christina Milan – So Amazin’
I am not sure if she can sing, but she is nice to look at.



NEW DVDS

The Producers
Getting bored with your Rent and Brokeback Mtn DVD? Well then this former Broadway play turned into a movie is for you! Not a Brokeback or Broadway fan? Well this is from the comdey god Mel Brooks and nothing is funnier then silly Nazis.



Mystery Science Theater 3000 vol.9
This is like crack for geeks.


When A Stranger Calls
A hot underage babysitter gets some creepy phone calls and they are comming from inside the house. Where is Dateline when you need them?


Crimson Tide – Unrated Extended Version
Yeah another movie is re-released onto DVD with an extra 2 minutes of footage and more commentaries you won’t listen too!!

Napoleon Dynamite – Like, the Best Special Edition Ever!
Finally a movie worthy of having a re-release. If you’re a huge Napoleon fan, I suggest you go buy the gift set Best Buy is offering for $35. It includes the 2 disc DVD, a Napoleon bobble head, a Kip bobble head, and 5 iPod covers. Just remember you dont sound anything like Napoleon and its not cool to constantly quote the movie in your daily conversatons.



New Police Story
88 year old Jackie Chan jumps off some buildings and kicks some ass.

The Ringer
A guy decides to act retarded and win the Special Olympics, but in the end he grows and becomes a man…blagh blagh blagh. The Farrelly Brothers claim they didn’t steal the idea from an old episode of South Park, in which Cartman did the same thing, but I dont belive anything they say since Stuck On You. It stars Johnny Knoxville with a bunch of actual window lickers that could easily beat him in a match of wits. Despite staring the annoying Knoxville the film is actually decent and has some good laughs. Also stars the hot and busty star of Grey’s Anatomy Katherine Heigl, though sadly she is fully clothed. *WWJ Pick of the Week*



Thats one hot Mormon




IN THEATHERS

The Da Vinci Code
The only book more popular then Harry Potter finally makes it to the big screen. Look for Christians and Albinos, with nothing better to do, on your local news protesting this movie. Tom Hanks tries to redeem himself for The Terminal, as he stars in this thriller. *WWJ Pick of the Week*

Hide the children!!!!


Over The Edge
Finding Nemo moves to the backyard. Avril Lavigne, Bruce Willis and the hilarious Steve Carell lend their voices to this Dreamworks picture.

See No Evil
The WWE makes a horror film staring WWE superstar Kane. Blood, guts, gore and figure four leg locks!!




That’s What’s Happening This Week bitches. Munchies, HBOTD and the newest WWJ segment, The FU of the Day are on tap for this week.

As always send hate mail to jimmy@WindowLickersArePeopleToo.com

Peace love and hair grease


The Da Vinci Code
The Ringer
Napoleon Dynamite – Like, the Best Special Edition Ever!
The Raconteurs – Broken Boy Soldiers

What's Happening This Week 5-10-06

Sorry for the lack of updates, but I have been pretty sick since Friday and I am finally starting to feel better. Luckily I had a sweet and sexy lady taking care of me over the weekend. Thanks MOM!!! Ill make sure to get you something nice for Mother’s day. The much anticipated 2006 WWJ Summer Drinking Tour’s stop at El Azteca for Cinco de Mayo sadly only lasted for one drink before I had to tap out. The weekend was uneventful as the majority of it was spent in bed, however I did learn it is possible to piss out your ass. Well enough about my anal leakage on to What’s Happening This Week.

NEW MUSIC

Gnarls Barkley - St.Elsewheres
Ok so I had this up last week, but it was an import. The US version of Cee Lo and Danger Mouse coming together to make music is now out.

Red Hot Chili Peppers – Stadium Arcadium
The RHCP are back with a brand new 2 disc album. They could have saved me and themselfs some time and just put out 1 disc.

Nick Lachey - Whats Left of Me

I haven’t got a chance to listen to the Cd yet, but I am sure it’s a bunch of songs crying over Jessica Simpson cheating on his ass with Bam Maggera and Johnny Knoxville. Since Nick is going to need the money if things don’t go his way in the divorce, I am making this the WWJ pick of the week. Ok I confess the single has grown on me so save your “You know how I know your gay” comments ass wipe!



Neil Young – Living With War
ATTENTION DIRTY HIPPIES!!! On your way to protest the war with that bitch Cindy Sheehan, well then you definitely need the new one from Neil Young on your Ipod. It will make the perfect soundtrack for when the riot police put those plastic twist ties on your wrists and haul you off to jail.



NEW ON DVD

Munich
Steven Spielberg take on the 1972 Olympic murders and pushes his politics in your face, but hey its got the HULK in it!!

The New World
Pocahontas gets her cherry popped by Colin Farrell and the white man steals land from the Indians, oh sorry Native Americans. I don’t even remember this making it to theaters. I do however remember the porno PokeHerOntAss which I would highly suggest, but if you want 2 hours of making you feel guilty for pushing the Indians to live in casinos and using their names for sport teams this film is for you.
GIVE IT TO HER JOHN!!!!


Nanny McPhee
It turns out this isn’t a Skinamax movie featuring American Idol hottie Katherine McPhee, so learn from my mistake and don’t order this kids flick



Grandmas Boy

If your going to get stoned and want to watch a movie this week, this Adam Sandler produced film is perfect for you. Since all the other DVDs this week suck, I will make this the WWJ pick of the week. I laughed a couple times and it meets two major requirements for a great movie, boobs and a monkey.



Rumor Has It
Somehow Kevin Costner is still making movies and we are supposed to believe he is banging Jennifer Anniston.

Big Momma’s House 2
Another sequel made way to late to capitalizing on the surprising success of the original.

This week sees a ton of TV shows on DVD so here is a run down of those.

Rescue Me season 2
Everybody Loves Raymond season 6
Scrubs season 3
That 70’s Show season 4
Dr.Katz Professional Therapist season 1
The Facts of Life season 1 and 2
Golden Girls season 5

The O FACE from Bea Arthur...my penis just commited sucide



IN THEATERS

Just My Luck
Lindsay Lohan stars in this teen flick about a lucky girl who becomes unlucky after kissing a guy. Its a PG-13 movie so don’t expect to see any of her assets.



Poseidon

A remake that may actually be better then the first, say what? Well I never saw the first, but come on anything with Kurt Russell is going to kick ass. This is the man who made Big Trouble In Little China people show some respect!! Josh Lucas and Richard Dreyfuss also star in this WWJ pick of the week.

You know what ol' Jack Burton says at a time like this?


Ok bitches that’s What’s Happening This Week, more of your favorite WWJ segments will start back up tomorrow. Oh don’t forget Yo Mama this Sunday, at least call her or get her a card and some flowers and remind her sexy ass that I like coffee with my eggs and bacon, not OJ.

As always send hate mail to jimmy@BoobsAndMonkeys.com

Peace love and hair grease

What's Happening This Week 5-3-06

Heres What's Happening this week bitches!! Not that you care but I am including my picks of the week


New Music

Tool - 10,000 Days
The perfect soundtrack for when you sacrfice goats and pray to Satan. * WWJ pick of the week*

Pearl Jam - Pearl Jam
Break out your plaid flannel shirts and your Doc Martin's, no its not the Butch Lesbian Society's monthly meeting, its the return of grunge rock..ummm whoo hoo?

Jewel - Goodbye Alice in Wonderland
Everyones favorite yoddle singing snaggletooth is back. Just because she has a messed up grill doesnt mean I still wouldnt hit that.

Thursday - City By the Light Divided
Some of that new rock stuff all the kids are listening to

Moob Deep - Blood Money
G..g.g.g.g.g.g.g.g G UNIT

Gnarls Barkley - St. Elsewhere
Cee Lo and Danger Mouse come together to make...music ya thats it music

New on DVD

The Family Stone
I have no clue what this flick is about, but it has hottie Rachel McAdams in it which is good enough for me. In case your gay and dont like Rachel McAdams, this movie has an all star cast which normaly means its a pile of shit.

Hoodwinked
Think of Shrek if it really sucked with a Red Ridding Hood story line. Jim Belushi and Gleen Clsoe are some of the voices.

King of the Hill Season 6
Yeah this show is still around

In Theaters

Mission Impossible 3
Crazy ass Tom Cruise tries to save the world by jumping on couches. Hate Tom and need reasons to see this flick? It was directed by JJ Abrams, the creator of Lost and Alias. Keri Russell grew her hair back out and is hot again. Phillip Seymor Hoffman, who unlike Tom is great actor, plays the crazy villian. *WWJ pick of the week*

Thats What's Happening This Week bitches!! Dont forget to show your support to all the protesting Mexicans this Cinco De Mayo, no dont vote for Pedro, do it by drinking a ton of Corona and Margaritas at your favorite Mexican restaurant. The 2006 WWJ Summer Drinking Tour will show its support on the patio at the El Azteca on Roswell Road from 7pm until the restaurant closes or I pass out. The Unnamed Segment will finaly make its long awaited return, no really I swear, but first it will be some Munchies to hold you over.

as always send hate mail to jimmy@VoteForPedro.com

peace love and hair grease

What's Happening This Week 4-25-06

Here is What's Happening this week Bitches!! This is the dry run it will get better so fuck off.

New Music

Godsmack - IV
Goo Goo Dolls - Let Love In
Bruce Spingsteen - We Shall Overcome
Taking Back Sunday - Living Louder
Rihanna - Girl Like Me
Mark Knopfler & Emmylou Harris - All The Roadrunning

New DVDS

Aeon Flux with Super Hero Hottness Charlize Theron

Match Point with the busty Scarlett Johansson

American Dad Volume 1 in case you get tired of watching Family Guy

Tristan & Isolde looks like a boring chick flick

Mission Impossible Collectors Edition Lets re-release a DVD thats been out for years YAY I am so excited I am going to jump on my couch

Wedding Singer Totally Awesome Edition Sweet another re-release with more shit on it that I will never watch

In Theaters

RV - Robin Williams and underage hottie JoJo star in this family comedy that will be on DVD in 3 weeks

Stick It - From the gods that brought us BringIt On. This time its about girls gymnastics staring Vanessa Lengies, the hot underage hostess from Waiting. Look for WWJ and several other creepy old men to frequent this film until the DVD comes out

United 93 - Film about 9-11 hijacked plane. Still seems too early for a film about 9-11 but expect several more to come out real soon


On TV
WWE's Backlash on PPV live this Sunday from Lexington, Kentucky. Main event is John Cena vs Edge vs. Tripple H for the WWE Championship...YAWNNNNNN

Lost is a recap episode this Wednsday

Family Guy takes on gay marriage for five minutes and spends twenty minutes exploring pop culture on Sunday

Wonder Showzen celebrates the good old days of America

South Park has Cartman finding tressure and calling Kyle a dirty Jew this Wednsday


Thats some of What's Happening This Week, if I missed something dont email me letting me know because if I didnt mention I dont give a shit about it and you shouldnt either. I will try to do this every Monday from now on. Another HBOTD on tap for tommorow and this one comes with a home made video. Hmm I wonder who it could be, place your bets now.

as always send hate mail to jimmy@RerunIsMyHero.com

peace love and hair grease